Jeff and I have been married for 10.5 years and together for 12. When we first met we would have passionate sex
for hours. We were fueled with desire, passion and lust. We spent time serving,
caressing and expressing our desire or one another. The desire and lust fueled the sex not the love. Sex filled
with lust and desire is hot, exciting and intense but this classification of sex
will not last. The lust and desire are the new of sex but soon the lust fades
and now what? Jeff and I found ourselves in this position. We loved one another
and realized all the great things that other person offers in our marriage( most
of the time) but the sex was no longer super hot and exciting. Sex had now
become something we placed on our to do list and at times sex didn't even make
it on the list for a few weeks or even a whole month. After three children, busy
schedules, a house that needed to be clean, chores that needed to get done, a
body that was feeling out of shape and not sexy at all...my sexual desire
started to disappear. This was painful and damaging to our relationship. I would
have to gear up for sex. I would tell myself tonight you are going to be
intimate and you will enjoy it. I did enjoy being with Jeff but I now felt
disconnected and started feeling a lot of shame and guilt. Sex had become
another thing for me to feel sad about. Another thing for me to feel like I am
not good enough . I felt like a little girl in an adult body. I felt guilty,
shameful and like I was doing something dirty and wrong. My heart ached and my
marriage was suffering...emotionally , physically and spiritually. I knew that a
strong sexual connection could bring back my emotional connection, my spiritual
connection and strengthen my marriage to a point where it flourishes.
Sex is critical in a marriage. For Jeff sex creates a feeling of security, love, passion and validation that he
can conquer and be the king of his castle. For me sex creates a feeling of
connection, happiness, fulfillment and centers me in a place of serenity. I am
now Jeff's queen and he is my king and we will rule this kingdom, our home,
together. When you are together long enough the lust fades and the hot,
exciting, intense sex goes away. You know have a choice. Do you live with just
ok sex that you have every once in a while, the kind of sex that leaves you
feeling empty and disconnected or do you start digging deep and decide to build
the electrifying, soul bonding sexual connection that only a husband and wife
that commit to the process can achieve?
Jeff and I have the best sexual connection we have experienced in 12 years. Our sexual connection is better then
the 4 hrs of lovemaking that we use to achieve when we had the lust so thick you
could cut it with a knife. We have an intimate connection that is soul bonding.
I have experienced being vulnerable and honest in the bedroom. I have
experienced laughter, anger and tears. Sex can and is great therapy for
emotional suppression if you are open to the releasing of this emotion in such
an intimate moment. Sex is a creation process. Sex is a man and woman who truly
and deeply care about one another exchanging energy and being open to the
creative process of becoming one. The bible says it best: Genesis 2:24~ That is
why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.
Sex is and will be full of excitement, desire and burning passion. We have to release our beliefs that we
have created or they have been created for us. We have to open up our locked
vault and replace all the items that have no value with thoughts and beliefs of
sexual satisfaction. We are sexual beings and when we are sexually satisfied our
entire state of being shifts and we perceive things in a whole new way.
I have really appreciated my personal journey. I had no idea that my story and experience would be reaching
other women and couples all around the world. For example I had a woman email me
and thank me for stepping out and sharing something so personal as she to
experienced feelings of sexual disconnection and she felt very drawn to watch
all my videos and appreciates my honesty and commitment. She now is taking small
steps to increase the sexual connection in her marriage.
We focus on the sexual connection between a husband and wife. We feel that the sexual connection controls 95% of emotions in a marriage. We know that this may be uncomfortable to address but sex
that creates emotional satisfaction will create stability in a marriage. I will
show you a step by step a how-to map. So lets look into the 5 beliefs that may
have been created in childhood that are not serving you in the
bedroom. Beliefs 1 and 2 are already released in this blog page!
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